| Yoni
is the Sanskrit word for the vagina that is loosely translated
as "sacred space" or "Sacred Temple." In
Tantra, the Yoni is seen from a perspective of
love and respect. This is particularly important for men to
learn.
Before beginning
the Yoni Massage it is important to create a space for
the woman (the receiver) in which to relax, from which she can
more easily enter a state of high arousal and experience great
pleasure from her Yoni. Her partner (the giver) will
experience the joy of giving pleasure and witnessing a
special moment. The Yoni Massage can also be used as a
form of "safe sex" and is an excellent activity to
build trust and intimacy. Some massage and sex therapists use it
to assist women to break through sexual blocks or trauma.
The goal of the Yoni
massage is not solely to achieve orgasm, although orgasm is
often a pleasant and welcome side effect. The goal can be as
simple as to pleasure and massage the Yoni. From this
perspective both receiver and giver can relax, and do not have
to worry about achieving any particular goal. When orgasm does
occur it is usually more expanded, more intense and more
satisfying. It is also helpful for the giver to not expect
anything in return, but simply allow the receiver to enjoy the
massage and to relax into herself.
The
Massage
Have the receiver
lie on her back with pillows under her head so she can look down
at her genitals and up at her partner (giver). Place a pillow,
covered with a towel, under her hips. Her legs are to be spread
apart with the knees slightly bent (pillows or cushions under
the knees will also help) and her genitals clearly exposed for
the massage. This position allows full access to the Yoni
and other parts of the body. Before contacting the body, begin
with deep, relaxed breathing. Both giver and receiver should
remember to breathe deeply, slowly and with relaxation
during the entire process. The giver will gently remind the
receiver to start breathing again if the receiver stops or
begins to take shallower breaths. Deep breathing, not
hyperventilating, is most important.
 Gently
massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, breasts, etc., to encourage
the receiver to relax and for the giver to prepare for touching
her Yoni. Pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil or
lubricant on the mound of the Yoni. Pour just enough so
that it drips down the outer lips and covers the outside of the Yoni.
Begin gently massaging the mound and outer lips of the Yoni.
Spend time here and do not rush. Relax and enjoy giving the
massage.
Gently squeeze
the outer lip between the thumb and index finger, and slide up
and down the entire length of each lip. Do the same to the inner
lips of the Yoni/vagina. Take your time. It is helpful
for giver and receiver to look into each other's eyes as much as
possible. The receiver should tell the giver if the pressure,
speed, depth, etc. need to be increased or decreased. Limit your
conversation and focus on the pleasurable sensation, too much
talking will diminish the effect.
The Crown
Jewel
The clitoris is
an amazingly complex structure, similar in function to the
male's glans, but surprisingly - up to four times more
sensitive. The glans portion of the clitoris holds 6,000 - 8,000
sensory nerve endings, more than any other structure in the
human body. This hypersensitive node has only one purpose: pleasure.
Nothing exceeds its ability to receive and transmit sensations
of touch, pressure or vibration. The glans are the "crown
jewel" of the clitoral system!
 Stroke
the clitoris with clockwise and counter-clockwise circles.
Gently squeeze it between thumb and index fingers. Do this as a
massage and not to get the receiver off. The receiver will
undoubtedly become very aroused but continue to encourage her to
relax and breathe.
Slowly and with
great care, insert the middle finger of your right hand into the
Yoni (there is a reason for using the right hand as
opposed to the left. It has to do with polarity in Tantra).  Very
gently explore and massage the inside of the Yoni with
this finger. Take your time, be gentle, and feel up, down and
sideways. Vary the depth, speed and pressure. It is important to
remember that this is a massage in which you are nurturing and
relaxing the Yoni. With your palm facing up, and the
middle finger inside the Yoni, move the middle finger in
a "come here" gesture or crook back towards the palm.
You will contact a spongy area of tissue just under the pubic
bone, behind the clitoris. This is the G-spot or in Tantra,
"the sacred spot". She may feel the need to
urinate, experience a little discomfort or most hopefully
pleasure. Vary the pressure, speed and pattern of movement. You
can move side to side, back and forth, or in circles with your
middle finger. You can also insert the finger that's between
your middle finger and pinky.
Most women should
have no problem and will enjoy the increased stimulation from
two fingers. Take your time and be very gentle.  You
may use the thumb of the right hand to stimulate the clitoris as
well. An option to try if the receiver wants it is to insert the
pinky of the right hand into her anus. [In Tantra, it is said
that when your pinky is gently massaging her anus, the next
finger and middle finger in her Yoni and your thumb on
her clitoris, "You are holding one of the mysteries of
the universe in your hand."]
You can use your
left hand to massage her breasts, abdomen, or clitoris. If you
massage the clitoris it's usually best to use the thumb in an up
down motion, with the rest of the hand resting on, and massaging
the mound.
The dual stimulation of right and left hands will provide much
pleasure for the receiver. Continue massaging, using varying
speed, pressure and motion, all the while continuing to breathe
deeply and looking into each other's eyes. She may have powerful
emotions come up and may cry. Just keep breathing and be gentle.
Some women have been sexually abused and need to be healed. A
giving, loving and patient partner can be of immeasurable value
to her. If she has an orgasm, keep her breathing, and continue
massaging if she wants. More orgasms may occur, each gaining in
intensity. In Tantra this is called "riding the wave."
In ending the
massage, slowly, gently, and with respect, remove your hands.
Allow her to relax and enjoy the afterglow of the Yoni
massage. Cuddling or holding is very soothing as well. As you
learn to master the Yoni Massage your sex life will be
greatly enriched and you will learn a great deal about feminine
sexuality. |
